Suicide Prevention Help - a web suicide prevention resource for people thinking about suicide and those who want to help them, suicide survivors, researchers, students, the helping professions and others.

A Friendship Letter and Web Directory of helpful suicide prevention resources友情文字网上资源目录帮助预防自杀


Suicide Prevention Help - The Friendship Letter预防自杀的求助信中友谊

Read a translation of the Friendship Letter in Arabic. Read a translation of the Friendship Letter in Chinese. Read a translation of the Friendship Letter in French. Read a translation of the Friendship Letter in German. Read a translation of the Friendship Letter in Italian. Read a translation of the Friendship Letter in Japanese. Read a translation of the Friendship Letter in Portuguese. Read a translation of the Friendship Letter in Russian. Read a translation of the Friendship Letter in Spanish.

Click on country flags to find translations of the Friendship Letter into various languages.按国别旗找翻译成各种语言文字的友谊. Note these translations are created by machine, and are provided to non-English speakers as a tool to understanding the content of this page.这些都说明,造成机器翻译、并提供非英语作为工具来认识这一页的内容.

Dear Friend:亲爱的朋友:

My name is Kenneth.我的名字叫午. If a friend confided in you with her or his suicidal thoughts and feelings, I am sure you would listen out of friendship, and help your friend to see the suicidal thoughts and feelings more realistically.如果你在与朋友私下她或他的自杀感受我相信你会听出友谊帮助你们的朋友看到了更真实的自杀性情怀. It is this same sense of friendship which has motivated me to prepare this material for you.正是这种发自内心的友谊具有动机我为你准备材料.

I am not a trained psychologist, but I do have a past history of suicidal thoughts, feelings and attempts.我不是一个训练有素的心理学家,但我有自杀的想法,过去的历史、感受和尝试. I am 52 years of age.我52岁. Over 20 years ago, I took 120 pills all at once because I believed I was not able to carry on.20多年前,我带120粒,因为我相信我一下子还无法进行. Two days after taking the overdose, I was discovered unconscious and close to death.两天后走过量,被发现倒卧接近死亡. Through the brilliant and dedicated efforts of the hospital staff, I survived.透过精彩耕耘,医院工作人员,我活着.

In the days following my survival, I realized that I would have to look at the underlying causes of my recurring suicidal thoughts and feelings.在以后的日子后,我生存我知道我要看看我经常自杀的原因情怀. With time, I began to recognize that I had my first suicidal thoughts and feelings as a young child.同时间,我开始认识到我有我的想法和感受,作为第一自杀幼儿. Throughout my youth, adolescence, and early adulthood, suicide was always a viable option and one considered seriously.整个少年时代,青春期、成年初期,自杀总是一个可行的选择之一认真考虑.

Over 20 years after this near-fatal suicide attempt, I am glad that I found the courage to live and address the many reasons why I was suicidal and depressed.20年后这几乎致命的自杀企图,我很高兴我找到了生活的勇气和解决的原因很多,我是自杀景. I fortunately had the help of others- friends, family members and a wise psychotherapist.幸好我有帮助别人的朋友,家人和明智心理.

Over 20 years ago, the future looked too difficult and painful to endure.20多年前,未来显得太困难,忍受痛苦. I can honestly say these past years were not always easy; but looking back, they have also been better than anything I could have imagined.我可以诚实地说,过去这些年来并不总是容易;但回头看看,他们也比任何我无法想象.


Kenneth Hemmerick Scanned Flowers - Pink Lavatera

Somehow, I seem to have had the strength to handle situations and issues that were making me very sad, afraid, angry, lonely and hopeless.或多或少,我还算有实力的处理情况、新问题,都使我很伤心,害怕,愤怒、孤独和绝望. Even though, at the time, I did not believe I had the will or strength.即使在当时,我不相信我的意愿或力量.

In sharing my experience and insights with you, I hope you will take this opportunity to see if any part of my experience is similar to yours and if there are any insights which you can take and apply to yourself -especially when experiencing the powerful and convincing impulse to commit suicide.在与你分享我的经验和见解,我希望你们能借此机会看看是否有一部分是你相近,我的经验如果您有任何见解能运用自己特别当遇到强大说服力冲动自杀.

People who are genuinely happy rarely commit suicide.真正快乐的人很少自杀. Yet oddly enough, many people who commit suicide often appear to be happy.但令人奇怪的是,许多人自杀往往显得很高兴. But this happiness is usually a mask that hides a depression, and this depression causes great mental and physical pain.但这种幸福通常面具隐藏了忧郁,而这忧郁身心造成极大痛苦.

Usually suicidal thoughts and feelings result from depression .通常自杀因抑郁情怀.

IF YOU SUSPECT THAT DEPRESSION IS PLAYING A KEY ROLE IN YOUR SUICIDAL IMPULSES, there are many effective psychotherapeutic techniques and medications which HELP relieve the excruciating pain of the horrible disease called depression.如果你想扮演一个重要角色忧郁自杀冲动你,有许多有效的药物和心理治疗技术,有助于减轻疼痛痛苦的可怕称为抑郁症. If you believe you are depressed, consult a medical professional without delay.如果你认为你是郁闷,请教专业的医疗报告. YOU CAN BE HELPED!你可以帮!

The following is not a replacement or substitute for professional counseling.以下不是更换或替代专业辅导. It is designed to share personal experience and insight.它旨在分享个人经验和胆识. In writing this letter, I offer you a beacon of hope without your having to resort to belief or faith.在写这封信,我向你希望的灯塔没有你们不必诉诸信仰或信仰.

My hope is that, after reading the following, you will be empowered to see your suicidal impulses with a bit more objectivity and understanding.我希望的是,看完后,你会看到你自杀的冲动与授权一点客观性与理解. With this understanding, you will develop a deeper appreciation of the nature of your own thinking and experience.有这种认识,你会更了解自己的性思维和经验.

Kenneth Hemmerick Scanned Flowers - Nasturtium I have found that in the past, when I had suicidal thoughts and feelings, they became MORE REALISTIC AND REAL every time I dwelt on them; and the more I dwelt on these thoughts and feelings, the more I was "trapped" in their relentless grip.我发现,在过去,当我有自杀的想法和感受,他们变得更加现实,真正每次我讲了他们;我讲了这些,越是感触,我更是"被困"的无情手里.

Suicidal thoughts and feelings are extremely painful and take up a lot of energy.自杀是非常痛苦的感受,并且承担了大量的精力. This can leave one feeling further drained and depressed and, as such, further committed to the idea of suicide.一本可以离开,忧郁情绪进一步流失,因此,要进一步为自杀念头.


It is a mistake to believe that because one is suicidal that one is also psychologically or emotionally deficient.相信这是一个错误,因为一个是自杀,一个是心理或感情上缺失. Many intelligent, caring people have come close to having a brush with death as a result of these thoughts and feelings.许多智能化、有爱心的人接近死亡的笔触由于这些感触.

At one point in my life, I believed that my having suicidal thoughts and feelings meant I wanted to die or I didn't want to live.一度在我人生我相信,我的感触是因自杀死亡或我想我不愿意生活. Later I came to see that my having suicidal thoughts and feelings meant I was not getting the full picture of my experience and I had been dwelling on only one aspect of my thoughts and feelings (my suicidal ones) to the exclusion of virtually everything else.后来我才知道我有自杀的想法和感受,我的意思是得不到全貌我的经验和我一直住在只有我一个侧面感触(我自杀个案)几乎排除了一切.

A snapshot of my thoughts and feelings, while I was depressed and suicidal, shows the theme of my suicidal impulses.饱览我的想法和感受,当我忧郁、自杀,说明我的主题自杀的冲动. The basic thoughts and feelings were:基本情怀:

Sometimes I would dwell on, let's say, the idea of "nobody will miss me" and then dwell upon the belief that "I am better off dead".有时我会讲啦,树立"没有人会怀念我的",然后系统阐述,认为"我赚死了". Then, I would think over and over again about how I would kill myself, and then back again to believing nobody would miss me if I were dead.当时,我觉得去去如何杀死我自己再回给我,如果我相信没有人会错过死亡.

It is as if suicidal thoughts and feelings can suck us in and keep us thinking more suicidal thoughts and feelings for hours, days, months and years, with little or no relief.它犹如自杀情怀我们可以吸吮更使我们的思想和自杀情怀小时,天,月,年很少或没有减免.

Sometimes I have even asked the difficult question over and over again, why?有时候甚至问我有棘手的问题一遍又一遍,为什么? Or the even more difficult question, why me?或是更难的问题,为什么是我? I have found that trying to analyze these and other similar questions in order to gain understanding is virtually impossible, and essentially a waste of time and effort.我发现,试图分析这些和其他类似的问题,以了解几乎是不可能的,而基本上是浪费时间和精力. For the real issue is not about morality, karma, God, or whether people who feel depressed and suicidal deserve this miserable pain.对于真正的问题不在于道德,业神,还是值得人沮丧和自杀这一悲惨痛苦.

The issue is about how to handle one's suicidal and depressing thoughts and feelings without being pulled into the vortex or center of their storm .问题是如何处理自己的自杀和沮丧情怀未经拖入漩涡或其暴风中心.

Kenneth Hemmerick Scanned Flowers - Michaelmas Daisy Although I was receiving considerable support from my therapist and others, I wanted further information, knowledge and understanding.我虽然接受治疗及其他相当支持我,我想要进一步的资料,了解和理解. What did I do?怎么办? I went to the bookstore and discovered the vast world of self-help, personal development and psychological support.我到书店,发现了广阔的天地自助、个人发展、心理支持. I was amazed to discover the many, possibly hundreds of books which all seemed to have, or purported to have, THE ANSWER.我很惊讶地发现了许多,可能几百册,似乎一切都看来还是有,答案. I was rightfully confused.我是堂堂正正混乱.

I was overwhelmed and very depressed by the question that, if so many people have the answer, why are there so many unhappy people?我倒非常郁闷的问题,如果这么多人有答案为什么有这么多的人不快乐? Oddly enough, I was so depressed by the decision I had to make in choosing a book, that I found myself feeling extremely suicidal once again.令人奇怪的是,我是这么不景气,我不得不做出的决定,选择了一本书,这敝人感觉非常再度自杀.


Standing in front of the self-help section of the bookstore, my thinking went something like this:站在自助路段的书店,我的思想一段描述:

Fortunately, something happened!幸好事情! A voice came over the P.A.过来的声音左右 system and I was jarred out of my suicidal thoughts and feelings.系统被惊醒了我,我自杀的想法和感受. I quickly chose a book about depression and brought it home and began to read.我选择了一本关于抑郁和迅速带回家,并开始阅读.

After I read the book, I bought and read another and then another and another until I had read every single book I could find, which related to my sadness, grief, disappointment, anger, rage, and utter loss of faith in myself and my ability to be happy ever again.我看过这本书后,我买来,然后再经过另另直到我看了我能找到的每一本书,这与我难过,伤心,失望,愤怒,愤怒,而睁着失去信心我和我的能力,应该高兴吗.

I read over 100 books and articles.我看过的书和文章100多. I remember thinking, after this serious reading, that if I could find the common denominator of all these books, theories and teachings, then I would have a possible key to addressing, effectively, the underlying causes of my depression and suicidal feelings.我记得思想,认真阅读后,如果我能找到最大公约数这些书籍理论与教诲,那么我也可能解决的关键,有效根本原因我心情忧郁和自杀.

And so, methodically, I went through the books and articles I had read to find some common thread.所以,有条不紊,我翻阅书籍和文章我看过找一些共同点.

I discovered all the teachings at one point referred to: jotting down thoughts as they come, meditating, prayer, relaxing, contemplating or watching one's breath or listening to one's heartbeat.我发现所有的教诲一度提到:记下他们的想法里,打坐、祈祷、放松、步向或收看自己的呼吸或听自己的心跳. Often they suggested, as fundamental to the success of their various techniques "to regularly take some time each and every day to simply listen to yourself, and your thoughts and feelings.他们建议经常作为基本保证了各项技术的成功"经常服用一段时间每天听听你和你的感想.

Kenneth Hemmerick Scanned Flowers - Sweet Pea
In time, I began to listen regularly to my thoughts and feelings; ESPECIALLY WHEN I was feeling suicidal.时候,我就开始经常听我的情怀;尤其当我感觉自杀. Eventually, I discovered that when I was depressed and suicidal, I was only tuning into one very limited aspect of my experience - my depressed and suicidal thoughts.终于,我发现,当我情绪低落,自杀,我只是整成一个方面我的经验很有限-我沮丧和自杀的想法. However, through listening to myself, I was able to hear and identify other thoughts and feelings.然而,透过自己听,我能听出其他的感想.


Some of these thoughts and feelings were profound and self-loving and as such, highly useful .其中一些感受是深刻的自我爱好,因此,非常有用.

For example:例如:

Kenneth Hemmerick Scanned Flowers - White Pearls

Of course, I had many more thoughts and feelings sandwiched in between the depressed and suicidal ones.当然,我有很多感触多夹在中间的压抑和自杀个案. But the little example which I outlined above shows some of the positive, life supporting thoughts and feelings I had:但这个小例子说明我上述的一些积极、生活配套我感触:


When I began to listen to a BIGGER PICTURE of the thoughts and feelings I was having, I was able to see my suicidal and depressed thoughts, objectively, in the company of other thoughts and feelings.当我开始听次要的,我有感触,我能看到我,忧郁自杀的想法,客观上在其他公司的感想. As a result of this increase in self-awareness or understanding, it seemed as if the magnetism or pull of the depressing and suicidal thoughts and feelings was not as strong.由于这一增长自我意识或理解,似乎现在的沮丧、磁性或拉自杀情怀不强.

These painful thoughts and feelings were being "diluted" by an awareness of other (life-supporting) thoughts and feelings.这些痛苦感受被"淡化"的意识其他(生命支持)情怀.

Gradually, I began to have some hope for the future, a little peace in the present and more understanding of the past.渐渐地,我就开始有一些对未来的期望在当前和平与少许更多地了解过去. I have found that if I keep repeating something to myself, then my mood gradually becomes affected by what I am saying.我发现,如果我把自己重复一遍,当时我的心情逐渐受我的意思.

For example, if I keep saying to myself: War.举例来说,如果我对自己不断地说:战争. Famine.饥荒. Crime.犯罪. Murder.谋杀. Pain.疼痛. Suffering.痛苦. Unemployment.失业. The Homeless - then after a time, I begin to feel depressed and hopeless about all the problems in the world.无家可归--那么久了,我开始感到沮丧和绝望的一切问题之一.

By the same token if I repeat words like KINDNESS.如果我重复同样的字眼善良. GOODWILL.善意. COMPASSION.同情心. LOVE.爱情. TOLERANCE.宽容. PEACE.和平. GENTLENESS - then after just even a few seconds, I start to feel a bit more positive and cheerful and sometimes, people who emulate these qualities come to mind and the whole planet seems less of a cruel, heartless world.柔情--即使只是几秒钟之后,我开始感到有点更积极、开朗、有时这些品质的人会想到学习和整个星球似乎少了残忍,无情的世界.

Kenneth Hemmerick Scanned Flowers - Hollyhock Over the years, I have had the opportunity to speak with many people who have felt depressed and suicidal.多年来,我有机会跟很多人都感到沮丧和自杀. I have never met anyone who usually enjoyed feeling this way.我从来没有见过这样的感觉,通常享受.

But I have even been told that people who are feeling suicidal and depressed feelings are "just that way because they want sympathy" and that " all they need is a good kick in the butt to stop them from feeling sorry for themselves."甚至有人告诉我,但我感觉的人自杀、情绪低落的",因为这种方式刚刚他们希望同情","他们需要的是一个良好的屁股踢来阻止他们悔恨自己."


These statements are sometimes made in an attempt to shock one out of a depressed or suicidal state.这些报表有时一个企图摆脱休克状态低迷或自杀. However, I have found in the past, these and other similar statements have only led me to feel even more worthless and incapable of breaking through my suffering.但是,我发现在过去,这些和其他类似的声明只是使我感到更加无法突破,我一文不值痛苦.

Years ago, a good friend of mine told me that when one is feeling depressed and suicidal, more often than not, insight vanishes and one begins to believe that the pain and suffering will continue for ever.年前,我的好朋友告诉我,当一个人意志消沉,自杀,往往不是有识之士认为消沉,一开始的痛苦将持续下去. This friend was right.这位朋友说得对. At one point in my life, I believed I was doomed to suffer forever.一度在我的生活中,我相信我是注定永远受苦.

From experience I can tell you honestly, The pain and suffering do pass away with time .从经验我可以告诉你实话,办故世的痛苦与时间. I find that simply being aware of what it is that I think and feel (without feeling bad about myself because I think or feel as I do) plays a significant role in my increasing happiness.我发觉根本尚未意识到这是什么感觉,我想和(无心疼自己因为我觉得还是跟我有同感)起着越来越重要的作用,我快乐.

One of the most interesting things I have learned about thoughts and feelings is that they, by themselves, are neither good nor bad.其中最有趣的事情,我学会了感触就是,由自己不好不坏. I discovered, I do not have to act on all the thoughts and feelings which I may have.我发现,我没有做的一切,我感受的可能.

One person may think, "I feel like eating a big piece of chocolate cake," and chooses not to eat the cake because he or she has diabetes.一个人怎么想,"我喜欢吃巧克力蛋糕大片",也不会因为他或吃草她有糖尿病. Another person who is also diabetic may have the idea and chooses to eat the cake despite the medical condition.另一人也可能有糖尿病、理念选择吃草尽管医疗条件. In both cases, the thought or feeling to have a big piece of chocolate cake was the same.在这两种情况下,思想或感觉有很大一块巧克力蛋糕是一样的. The decision to act on the thought or feeling was different .决定行事的思想或感受是不同的.

In the same way, when it comes to suicidal thoughts and feelings we can listen to them (often they seem to have a way of making themselves heard), but as humans, we have the ability to realize that our painful thoughts and feelings mean that we are experiencing pain .在同样的情况下,说到自杀情怀可以倾听他们(往往他们似乎有路听到自己制作),但作为人类,我们有能力知道我们的痛苦感受意味着我们正在经历痛苦.

Sometimes painful feelings surface as thoughts different from their original cause.有时心情沉痛地为自己的想法不同于原来的事业. In the same way, a very bad toothache can make us snappy or miserable to a loved one whom we would never ever want to hurt.在同样的情况下,一个很坏牙痛可以使我们对至亲惨薄或将永不想为谁伤害.

Kenneth Hemmerick Scanned Flowers - Loosestrife I have created this letter because of all the help I have received over the years.这封信是因为我创造的一切帮助我收到多年来. I want to give back something and help others.As I said previously, in the past, I suffered with my suicidal thoughts and feelings.我要给回一些帮助others.as我曾经说过,在过去,我与我遭受自杀性情怀. Today these thoughts and feelings are no longer a reality in my life.今天,这些思想和感情不再现实人生.

In sharing my experience with you, I hope you can see that it is very possible and likely, that one day, (maybe today!) you will begin to feel a bit more hopeful about your situation and not feel so bad .在我的经验与大家分享,希望你能看到它很可能和可能,有一天,(也许今天!)你会开始感受到一点希望,你不觉得这样恶劣的情况.

I hope you can see the amount of care I have put into this writing because I intuitively feel there is probably a lot about you that is unique, talented, special, of great value and worth caring about.我希望你能看到多少照顾我,因为我已经投入写作这直觉感到也许你说了很多关于独特,有才华,特别,很有价值,值得关心.


I am sure, if you and I had the opportunity to talk and you told me your life story, there would be a lot that I COULD LEARN FROM YOU.我深信,如果你有机会和我谈话,你告诉我你的人生故事所以会有很多,我可以向你学习. You probably have handled situations and issues which were extremely difficult and yet you managed to deal with them with a bit of class.也许你曾经处理极其困难的情况和问题,但你们能够对付这些有点阶级.

When I was feeling very down, and hopeless and powerless, it was good to hear some encouraging words from someone who truly cared .当我感到非常下跌、无望、无力、有人听到一些令人振奋的好有人真正从关心. Even though, at first, I did not believe or trust the words, caring or kindness of the person who was helping me.虽然,起初,我不相信的话还是信任,仁爱或善良的人帮我.

I have found that true kindness, regardless of how I felt or what I believed at the time, always helped to relieve my horrible pain.我发现,真实善良,不管如何,我相信我的感觉还是当时我总是有助于减轻可怕的痛苦. You may believe, at this time, nobody would want to help you.你可以相信,在这个时候,没有人会愿意帮助你. I can say, from experience, there are many people who are willing to lend a gentle, caring hand.我可以说,从经验来看,有许多人愿意施以温柔、关怀. ALL YOU NEED TO DO IS ASK FOR HELP .只要你是求救.

If you cannot think of anyone, please CALL A CRISIS OR SUICIDE PREVENTION CENTER - (see Crisis Centers )如果你想不出任何可致电或预防自杀危机中心(见危机处理中心)

These kind, dedicated and trained people will help you because they genuinely understand.这些实物,并专门人才会真正帮助你,因为他们明白. You are not alone; and YES, YOU DO HAVE A FRIEND!你不是独自;是的,你一个朋友! When I was feeling bad and needed their help, THEY HELPED ME A LOT.当我心情不好,需要他们的帮助,他们帮了我不少.

Love from Kenneth爱戴午

Write Me!写我! I can learn from you.我可以向你学习.

P.S.陈鹏 Bookmark or save this page as a Favorite to read again as a reminder that depressive, suicidal pain and suffering can pass away.为挽救这一页书签或最爱看再次提醒人们,忧郁、自杀痛苦可以故世. If you forget to do this, googling "suicide prevention help" or "kenneth friendship letter" will help you find this page again.如果你忘记这样做,googling"预防自杀帮助""午信友"会帮你找到这一页.

Click Here!按此! to obtain your free eBook version of this Friendship Letter (.exe file) for PC users with Windows Operating System and Internet Explorer 5.+ browser.电子书版免费索取你这种友谊信(.可执行文件),与视窗操作系统的个人电脑用户和探索者5.+浏览.

Or Click Here!点此! to find a printable version of this text in PDF format.(Requires Adobe Acrobat Reader Free.)找到这个文本打印版PDF格式.(读者需要坯体杂技免费).


Kenneth Hemmerick Scanned Flowers - Black Eye Susan



Browse the Suicide Prevention Help - Global Web Directory浏览预防自杀求助全球网页指南
to find additional suicide prevention resources in categories such as:寻找额外预防自杀资源类,如:
Conferences and Events会议和活动
Crisis Centers危机中心
Feeling Suicidal?自杀的感觉?
Government Initiatives政府措施
Groups at Risk危险群体
Guides and Directories导游和通讯录
Helping Someone帮他人
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