Another Anniversary!

About a year ago, I decided to give Suicide Prevention Help a face lift. Responses to the site have been most positive, with a recorded 1,341,147 hits, 637,355 page views and 209,052 visits page views from the following countries and sectors:

Afganistan, Algeria, Argentina, Aruba, Australia, Austria, Bahamas, Bahrain, Bangladesh, Barbados, Belarus, Belgium, Bosnia And Herzegovina, Brazil, Brunei Darussalam, Bulgaria, Canada, Cambodia, Chile, China, Christmas Island, Colombia, Costa Rica, Côte D'ivoire, Croatia (Hrvatska), Cyprus, Czech Republic, Denmark, Dominican Republic, Ecuador, El Salvador, Egypt, Estonia, Ethiopia, Fiji, Finland, France, Georgia, Germany, Ghana, Greece, Guam, Guatemala, Guinea-bissau, Honduras, Hong Kong, Hungary, India, Indonesia, Iran, Iraq, Israel, Italy, Ireland, Jamaica, Japan, Jordan, Kazakhstan, Kenya, Korea, Kuwait, Latvia, Lebanon, Lithuania, Luxembourg, Macao, Malaysia, Mauritius, Mexico, Monaco, Morocco, Nepal, Netherlands, New Zealand (Aotearoa), Nigeria, Non-Profit Organizations, Norway, Oman, Pakistan, Peru, Philippines, Poland, Portugal, Puerto Rico, Qatar, Romania, Russia, Saudi Arabia, Serbia and Montenegro, Seychelles, Singapore, Slovakia, Slovak Republic, Slovenia, South Africa, Spain, Sri Lanka, St. Vincent and the Grenadines, Senegal, Sweden, Switzerland, Syria, Taiwan, Tanzania, Tatarstan, Thailand, Trinidad and Tobago, Tunisia, Turkey, Tuvalu, United Kingdom, United States, Uraguay, Vatican City, Viet Nam, Ukraine, United Arab Emirates, US Commercial, the US Military, Uzbekistan, Yemen, Zaire, Zambia and Zimbabwe.

Most Active Categories:

Teens and Young Adults

Personal Testimonies

Helping Someone

Crisis Centers

LGBT

Total Categories: 120
Total Links: 2448

I would like to highlight two recent additions to the Directory:

SASS - Suicide Awareness Survivor Support
http://www.sass-mokan.com/

This group believes the public must be educated about suicide and has delineated five steps towards this goal, including:

1. Education
2. Public Awareness
3. Networking with other agencies
4. Uniting survivors, and
   
5. Providing information to area support groups

The website is housed in the Directory under Survivor Resources.

Choose Life Highland
http://www.chooselifehighland.co.uk/

This Scottish organization offers support to people who feel uncomfortable asking for help in a face-to-face situation.

The site is categorized in the Directory under Crisis Centers -Europe.

I wish both organizations much success in their work to prevent suicide and to offer help to those who are suffering from the pain of losing a loved one to suicide.

Two Stories - A man originally from Kenya, a doctor from Sri Lanka

Over the years, I have received emails from people responding to the Friendship Letter. They have shared how the suicide of a friend or family member has affected them or their family, or they often relate how they have suffered from depressing and suicidal thoughts and feelings, and how they have managed or are managing to cope.

I recently received an email from Chris Okubo who describes his account as:

"a story of a boy - now a man - whose childhood began in Kenya. A boy whose childhood had an outer appearance of being normal and happy. His mother tries to save him and his siblings by escaping to America, where her son grows up into a seemingly normal man, but is tormented by his childhood and becomes an alcoholic and a notorious womanizer." Chris has created a website that explains how he turned to his faith, after nearly killing himself using an automobile."

You can visit his website at: http://www.chrisokubo.com/.

Another email recently came from a doctor in Sri Lanka. Dr. Nilvala Vijayasiri wrote:

"I am a doctor from Sri Lanka, happily married for 12 years, having three children.

There were five in our family, I being the youngest with two brothers and two sisters. We became four on Christmas eve of 1980. My eldest sister, second in the family, walked out one sunny morning, walking about three kilometres to lie down on a railtrack.

My father was alcoholic. There were frequent, almost daily fights between the parents. My mother was a hardworking woman. But foolhardy at times. There were many separations and unions. This was life from our birth. It was a life which had no constancy. No solace. A life lived in poverty and shame in a middle class neighbourhood. It was the shame, frustration and hopelessness that sent my 19 year old sister to her death. She was a responsible, honest and just character. She was like our second mother.

We all thought of suicide. We promised each other we would not resort to it for it would only bring more shame and heartache for the others. Yet, she being the eldest of sisters, the burden may have been too much to bear.

My second brother saw her lying dead on the rail tracks. Later, he was in the wilderness of drug abuse and vagabond life for nearly 20 years, coming out of it as if by a miracle, just 3 years ago. So we are at least four again.

My elder brother joined the army, topped his batch and went on to have a good career there. My second sister and I entered Law and Medical faculties and are now an attorney and a doctor respectively. The best thing to have happened is that my second brother came out of his wilderness to be with us again.

When I look back, I feel, that if only my elder sister had some energy left to live on for another year or two, she may have escaped the rot we were in to forge her own life and career like we did. The pain in each of us is still very great. It still brings tears. Most definitely it will never go away.

We are taught that everything in life is temporary. All material things are impermanent. Our happinesses do not last for ever. But then it is also true with the sadness. True with so called no win situation. Nothing can last for ever. Situations are bound to change. The key then is patience and looking out. Sometimes it is difficult to find help. It was for us. We did not know where to turn to when our lives as children became miserable. Especially in a country like Sri Lanka where precious few sources exist even now let alone two or three decades back.

I do not know whether by reading this any one who has thoughts of sadness and suicide would benefit. I sincerely hope so. That was the only reason for my making these comments. Anybody who wishes to correspond is welcome to do so. I hope I could be of some help to some body in their time of need. Some thing we did not have when we were children."

In both these stories, and a constant theme of the letters that I receive, is that there is "the appearance" of a normal, happy home life or childhood, when in actual fact there is an abundance of inhumaneness or cruelty. But there is often a general lack of simple kindness that enables one to grow and "be" in a safe, loving and caring environment.

Tragically, there is great shame and stigma associated with suicidal thoughts and feelings and mental health in general. With this cloud of shame/stigma to whom can one turn to in desperate times - a family member, teacher, friend, personal physician or member of the clergy? I remember telling a member of the clergy, many years ago, about how depressed I was. His answer was simple "I had nothing to depressed about. I had a good home, family, successful career and was of good health." This response only led me to feel even more helpless in my despair. Often, people simply do not know how to respond to a depressed and suicidal loved one. For this reason, I included in the Suicide Prevention Help Web directory a category entitled Helping Someone.

Fortunately, there are many suicide prevention or crisis hotlines that offer a truly caring and empathetic ear. The people who man these telephone lines are trained and do not judge someone simply because life is giving them a rough go. If you need to find a crisis center, please browse Crisis Centers to find support anywhere in the world.

Finally, one can learn how to begin treating oneself and others with genuine kindness. I created a free online course and eBook called A Guide in Humane Awareness. This program leads learners towards a deeper appreciation of how kindness, cruelty and humaneness impact one's life.

I have learned, over the years, that no matter how bad I felt about the particular situation I was in, that if I performed an act of kindness towards another, or especially towards myself, the painful feelings I was experiencing abated, and I was given the opportunity to appreciate the simple goodness that is within. This goodness, or the essential core of an individual, is the life-supporting force that enables one to live without shame, and offers one the courage to ask for help.

World Suicide Prevention Day - 10 September, 2007

World Suicide Prevention Day on September 10, is an annual event sponsored by the International Association for Suicide Prevention, in collaboration with the World Health Organization. This year the theme of World Suicide Prevention Day is "Suicide across the Life Span." This theme has been adopted to emphasize the fact that suicide occurs in all ages and suicide prevention and intervention strategies may be adapted to meet the needs of different age groups.

Quoted from a brochure published by the International Association for Suicide Prevention (IASP).

Please click on the links below to download the following information flyers that describe how suicide is cross-generational.

• Information flyer in English (pdf)

• Information flyer in French (pdf)

• Information flyer in Chinese (pdf)

Over the years, I have answered letters from people of all ages who have been suicidal. Often we think that suicide is an issue that is primarily concerned with young people, however elderly suicide is also an issue of grave concern. For this reason, I created a category in the Suicide Prevention Help Web Directory. Please see:

Suicide Prevention Help - Global Web Directory » Groups at Risk » Elderly, The

Most important however, suicide prevention hotlines or crisis centers are chronically under-funded. Please consider making a donation, large or small, to your local crisis prevention center. If you are an empathetic individual, I ask you to volunteer at an suicide intervention or prevention center. These organizations play an essential role in saving lives.

Here is the link for this week's Guardian Weekly Podcast that includes an interview with me, in advance of World Suicide Prevention Day.

Turning lives around

The Guardian Weekly Global Network has published an article I wrote entitled, "Turning lives around."

In addition, 93 new resources have been added to the Suicide Prevention Help Web Directory, primarily in the following categories:

Suicide Prevention Help - Global Web Directory » Groups at Risk » Bullied, The

Suicide Prevention Help - Global Web Directory » Groups at Risk » Military

Suicide Prevention Help - Global Web Directory » Guides and Directories » Guides

Suicide Prevention Help - Global Web Directory » Mental Health Issues » Anxiety and Other Disorders

Suicide Prevention Help - Global Web Directory » Mental Health Issues » Depression

Suicide Prevention Help - Global Web Directory » News » Asia

Suicide Prevention Help - Global Web Directory » News » Europe

Suicide Prevention Help - Global Web Directory » News » North America

Suicide Prevention Help - Global Web Directory » News » Oceania

Suicide Prevention Help - Global Web Directory » Teens and Young Adults

According to Webalizer Version 2.01 and StatCounter, over the past year, the Suicide Prevention Help site and directory, have received 896,311 hits, 133,975 visits and 440,028 page views from the following countries and sectors:

Afganistan, Algeria, Argentina, Aruba, Australia, Austria, Bahamas, Bahrain, Bangladesh, Barbados, Belarus, Belgium, Bosnia And Herzegovina, Brazil, Brunei Darussalam, Bulgaria, Canada, Cambodia, Chile, China, Christmas Island, Colombia, Costa Rica, Côte D'ivoire, Croatia (Hrvatska), Cyprus, Czech Republic, Denmark, Dominican Republic, Ecuador, El Salvador, Egypt, Estonia, Ethiopia, Fiji, Finland, France, Georgia, Germany, Ghana, Greece, Guinea-bissau, Honduras, Hong Kong, Hungary, India, Indonesia, Iran, Iraq, Israel, Italy, Ireland, Jamaica, Japan, Jordan, Kazakhstan, Kenya, Korea, Kuwait, Latvia, Lebanon, Lithuania, Luxembourg, Macao, Malaysia, Mauritius, Mexico, Monaco, Morocco, Nepal, Netherlands, New Zealand (Aotearoa), Nigeria, Non-Profit Organizations, Norway, Oman, Pakistan, Peru, Philippines, Poland, Portugal, Puerto Rico, Qatar, Romania, Russia, Saudi Arabia, Serbia and Montenegro, Seychelles, Singapore, Slovakia, Slovak Republic, Slovenia, South Africa, Spain, Sri Lanka, St. Vincent and the Grenadines, Senegal, Sweden, Switzerland, Syria, Taiwan, Tanzania, Tatarstan, Thailand, Trinidad and Tobago, Tunisia, Turkey, Tuvalu, United Kingdom, United States, Uraguay, Vatican City, Viet Nam, Ukraine, United Arab Emirates, US Commercial, the US Military, Uzbekistan, Yemen, Zaire, Zambia and Zimbabwe. New recent entries are in Bold Face.

Most Active Categories:

Crisis Centers

Helping Someone

Personal Testimonies

Teens and Young Adults

Groups at Risk

Total Categories: 120
Total Links: 2391